Let us examine some of the symptoms of the fear of criticism. The majority of people permit relatives, friends, and the public at large to so influence them that they cannot live their own lives, because they fear criticism.
Huge numbers of people make mistakes in marriage, stand by the bargain, and go through life miserable and unhappy, because they fear criticism which may follow if they correct the mistake. (Anyone who has submitted to this form of fear knows the irreparable damage it does., by destroying one’s ambition and the desire to achieve.)
Millions of people neglect to acquire belated educations, after having left school, because they fear criticism.
Countless numbers of men and women, both young and old, permit relatives to wreck their lives in the name of duty, because they fear criticism. (Duty does not require any person to submit to the destruction of his personal ambitions and the right to live his won life in his own way.)
People refuse to take chances in business, because they fear the criticism which may follow if the fail. The fear of criticism in such cases is stronger than the desire for success.
Too many people refuse to set high goals for themselves, or even neglect selecting a career, because they fear the criticism of relatives and “friends” who may say, “Don’t aim so high, people will think you are crazy.”
When Andrew Carnegie suggested that I devote twenty years to the organization of a philosophy of individual achievement my first impulse of thought was fear of what people might say. The suggestion set up a goal for me, far out of proportion to any I had ever conceived. As quick as a flash, my mind began to create alibis and excuses, all of them traceable to the inherent fear of criticism. Something inside of me said, “You can’t do it – the job is too big, and requires too much time—what will your relatives think of you? – how will you earn success, what right have you to believe you can do it? – who are you, anyway, to aim so high? — remember your humble birth – what do you know about philosophy? – people will think you are crazy – (and they did) – why hasn’t some other person done this before now?
These, and many other questions flashed into my mind, and demanded attention. It seemed as if the whole world had suddenly turned its attention to me with the purpose of ridiculing me into giving up all desire to carry out Mr. Carnegie’s suggestion.
I had a fine opportunity, then and there, to kill off ambition before it gained control of me. Later in life, after having analyzed thousands of people, I discovered that most ideas are stillborn, and need the breath of life injected into them through definite plans of immediate action. The time to nurse an idea is at the time of its birth. Every minute ti lives, gives it a better change of surviving. The fear of criticism is at the bottom of the destruction of most ideas which never reach the planning and actions stage.
Millions of people neglect to acquire belated educations, after having left school, because they fear criticism.
Countless numbers of men and women, both young and old, permit relatives to wreck their lives in the name of duty, because they fear criticism. (Duty does not require any person to submit to the destruction of his personal ambitions and the right to live his won life in his own way.)
People refuse to take chances in business, because they fear the criticism which may follow if the fail. The fear of criticism in such cases is stronger than the desire for success.
Too many people refuse to set high goals for themselves, or even neglect selecting a career, because they fear the criticism of relatives and “friends” who may say, “Don’t aim so high, people will think you are crazy.”
When Andrew Carnegie suggested that I devote twenty years to the organization of a philosophy of individual achievement my first impulse of thought was fear of what people might say. The suggestion set up a goal for me, far out of proportion to any I had ever conceived. As quick as a flash, my mind began to create alibis and excuses, all of them traceable to the inherent fear of criticism. Something inside of me said, “You can’t do it – the job is too big, and requires too much time—what will your relatives think of you? – how will you earn success, what right have you to believe you can do it? – who are you, anyway, to aim so high? — remember your humble birth – what do you know about philosophy? – people will think you are crazy – (and they did) – why hasn’t some other person done this before now?
These, and many other questions flashed into my mind, and demanded attention. It seemed as if the whole world had suddenly turned its attention to me with the purpose of ridiculing me into giving up all desire to carry out Mr. Carnegie’s suggestion.
I had a fine opportunity, then and there, to kill off ambition before it gained control of me. Later in life, after having analyzed thousands of people, I discovered that most ideas are stillborn, and need the breath of life injected into them through definite plans of immediate action. The time to nurse an idea is at the time of its birth. Every minute ti lives, gives it a better change of surviving. The fear of criticism is at the bottom of the destruction of most ideas which never reach the planning and actions stage.
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